It’s surprising to me how many people I hear about that have relationship problems which stem from the Internet. Here are a few of the top issues I’ve heard about.
Credit: Channah
Social Networking Sites
When you have a significant other, hot web spots like Myspace and Facebook can become a breeding ground for suspicion and misunderstandings. While I know that these sites are definitely used by two-timers for nefarious purposes, they can also lead to pointless arguments.
Even though these websites conveniently have a place to announce your relationship status, it doesn’t come with a tag line asking your ex to please limit their “How are ya’s” to private messages. A harmless inside joke can be wildly misconstrued and public comments taken out of context can lead to blow ups.
First and foremost, don’t read into things. Before you go off the deep-end because Stacy from work has been dropping comments on your man’s Myspace, find out what’s going on first. Sure, there’s a chance he’s cheating, there’s always a chance. But jumping to that conclusion could be a mistake. If comments are being left by someone you’ve never heard of inquire about the connection calmly, and don’t assume the other person is lying. Admit you were a little confused by the meaning of a message and see if there’s a story behind it. But if there have been no other suspicious indicators or a track record of deception, don’t let it eat at you because usually, the meaning is as superficial as the medium.
Internet Addiction
It’s no joke, for some people the web is crack. There are men and women who can’t get enough, whether it’s an online game, blogging, social networking updates, shopping, or just straight up surfing, the hook of choice varies but the dependence is the same. If you happen to be dating someone with this kind of addiction, it may be hard to know how to deal.
Addiction of any kind is poison for all of life’s relationships, romantic and otherwise. When the Internet is the habit it can be especially tough because so many people don’t even recognize this as a legitimate problem. They may think it’s fine and harmless and feel you are over re-acting.
Make sure you address the issue seriously, don’t write it off. Do research on the subject and use tools like Internet Addiction Tests to help you. It’s important to let the other person see your perspective so he/she knows that you feel neglected in favor of the net and that you want more time with the person you care about. If the problem is serious, you can seek help in diagnosing, confronting, and working through the problem.
Porn
There’s no talking about how the Internet can play a negative role in relationships without talking about porn. The Internet offers unbridled fulfillment of any fantasy, available for your own private consumption. It’s easy to get lost in that kind of decadence. But if it happens in a relationship, there can be a difficult road ahead.
When a dude—let’s just call him a dude, for fun, because it could be a woman, but let’s face it, this is a pervasively male predilection—gets heavily into Internet porn, he largely has to keep it a secret. Nothing good ever came from a secret about sex which means there are bound to be problems when she figures it out one day, because she will.
There are places to get information about Porn Addiction which can help you if you have a problem or know someone who does. There are countless reasons why someone might become addicted to porn, but communication is the first step. It’s not impossible to overcome an obstacle like this. If both people can talk openly and trust one another, there can be renewed love, sex, and intimacy.
Whatever problem the Internet may be causing in your relationship, be open to talking about it, and if the problem is seriously enough know when to ask for help. Do you know of any other Internet related relationship problems?
