Sawyer: What Would YOU Do To This LOST Bad Boy?

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Enigmatic TV show Lost delivers drama, mystery and intrigue, but a lot of the buzz centers on the romantic entanglements of Kate, Jack and Sawyer. Initially, she was drawn to Jack, who quickly emerged as the group leader. And why not? He’s moody, intelligent, great looking, and an overall take-charge kinda guy. What a catch! I’d totally do him. Kate seemed to have hit the jackpot. This is a guy we could really settle down with, even if he has the emotional range of a flounder and signs of some serious mental instability. Hey, who doesn’t come with baggage? He’s a doctor; mom would be so proud. But then when Kate plants a big sloppy wet kiss on him with her hair all sexy wild and her skimpy tank top plastered to her rockin’ body, he doesn’t seem to have any clue what to do with her. My guess is the writers were trying to create sexual tension, but just wound up leaving Jack looking terminally confused, and not in a good way. Now Sawyer, he’d have known what to do. He’d have thrown me…her - I meant her, I swear - right down in the mud and the weeds and had her clothes off in seconds.

Promotional Photo Courtesy of ABC.com

Which brings us to the bad, bad boy of Lost, and the dilemma faced by nearly every woman alive (we really should know better). Sawyer is big, he’s surly, he’s scruffy, and sometimes he’s downright mean. He’s got a shady past, selfish tendencies, and no discernible future. And still we want to rip his clothes off with our teeth. The question is why him and not Jack? Is it because a dependable guy like Jack would probably protest about the cost of the shirt? “Wait, stop! what are you doing? This is a silk shirt, do you know how much this costs? I’ll take it off and fold it neatly and then we can resume lovemaking.” Any guy I can imagine saying “resume lovemaking” just can’t get me juiced up.

My personal theory is that it’s probably primal instinct dating back to the dawn of mankind, when survival depended on a man’s ability to bring down a woolly mammoth, and not his ability to think. Cavegirls made their choices based on the man most likely to survive, not the one most likely to succeed. There’s probably some “thrill of the hunt” psychology thrown in there as well. Bad boys are a lot less likely to say the “L” word, so if you can pin one down, SCORE! You have to win their affections. Sawyer pushes and pulls to keep Kate off balance all the time. He alternates between visceral reactions to her that show his need and complete – and almost hostile – rejection. Of course, I know deep down inside, he’s doing it to protect her, because he truly loves her and knows he can’t give her the life she deserves. Yes, I totally am that pathetically sappy. If you aren’t nodding right now, you’re lying to yourself. You know it too.

Jack, on the other hand, can support her, pay for a legal team to rival OJ’s - the ones that got him off the murder rap, not the ones that let him go to prison for armed robbery (slackers) – and devote his life to pleasing her. Assuming he doesn’t get drunk and act crazy back on the mainland in later episodes, but that’s really not the point of this line of reasoning. If only he’d stop thinking and get down to the business of raw passion. He’s got the body and he’s got the looks; he just needs to emote. Sawyer emotes our socks off.

So the bottom line is as simple as it is instinctual. Sawyer’s sex drive is palpable; you can feel it pulsing right off the screen. We’re not sure if Jack actually has a sex drive. He’s like our brother, the surgeon, that Dad likes better than us.