TV Romance – Does It Follow Or Lead?
March 11th, 2009 by Queen of RomanceSometimes I wonder how well TV romances actually chronicle the changing view of relationships for each era, and that leads me to wonder what direction we’re headed in. Did we become too cynical to sustain an historical expectation of romance and family?
In the fifties, we had couples like the Cleavers from Leave it to Beaver and the Ricardos from I love Lucy. The man was clearly in charge, but he would never disrespect his wife. Lecture her as if he were her father, yes. Put her down, no. The Honeymooners debuted in 1955, bringing with it the first ventures into marital discord and less idealized view of marriage and of the world. Ralph Kramden was distinctly blue collar, coarse, insulting, and threatening, but Alice was no pushover, and she wasn’t scurred of him, no sir. She got all up in his face, ghetto fabulous style. All she needed was a finger snap and a tube top to fit right into the Jerry Springer show several decades in the future.
Sixties Hollywood tried to hold on to the idealized marriage image with Oliver Wendell Douglas from Green Acres and The Dick Van Dyke Show‘s Laura and Rob, but I find it interesting that shows during that time were more often about families and situations where the men were widowers. The Beverly Hillbillies, My Favorite Martian, The Andy Griffith Show, My Three Sons…I theorize that it was easier to deal with no wife and mother than with her changing role in society.
The came the aftermath of the turbulent sixties and relationships, mirroring the attitude of the outspoken public, took a somewhat darker turn. Husbands like Archie Bunker from All in the Family were still trying to be father figures to their wives, and the wives were still more or less compliant, but they were also portrayed as incompetent and air-headed. The role of subservient wife was openly mocked, and the message was clear. But not all hope was lost. Along came Maude and Good Times, shows that gave us strong matriarchs. The tide began to turn in the 70s. I don’t know if it was for the better, because the pendulum did not come to rest in the middle, but swung to the far left, where it stuck for a long time. In a world rapidly being overtaken by over-sensitivity, with a female population finding a voice and the power of the purse strings for the first time, we found a new target to ridicule. Men. TV homes became centered on powerful working moms and men were suddenly back seat drivers…and marriage lost a little more of its TV gloss.
We can virtually skip ahead to the 90s, past the Bundys and the Simpsons and Everybody Loves Raymond, because those shows all carry the same message: Husbands are idiots and the wife really runs the show.
But somewhere, between the sweet relationships of Friends‘ Ross and Rachel followed by Chandler and Monica, and that of Lily and Marshall from How I Met Your Mother, I think we may have regained our balance. Men and women are finally equal in the relationship. Both parties have faults and neither dominates.
If TV becomes less cynical…will we also become less cynical? Or is it the other way around? Does TV mirror the relationships of today or do we mimic what we see on TV? You tell me.
Tags: Relationships. Couples, TV Romance
